if only ...

if only i could see thru these tears and these lies,

then maybe, just maybe, i’d start to realize.

if only i could make out what your trying to do,

i’d be able to figure out if your intentions were true.

if i was able to read thru your every line,

then maybe I wouldn’t feel so lost and blind.

if i could figure out just what you wanted from me,

then maybe all your lies could set me free. 

and maybe one day i’ll figure this all out for myself,

stop painting my world with lies and realize your selfish.

stop being so naive and trying to find the best in you,

when all along everyone else was right, what they said was true.

that your just a boy wanting the best of both worlds.

unable to give up something for someone else afterwards.

you paint the world black with all the lies you tell,

and one day you will be alone with only a broken heart left to sell.

but no one will want your heart, its cold and made of stone.

loneliness will circulate and you will feel it in every bone. 

and maybe that is when you will realize what its like to hold a broken heart.

to watch your life crash and burn all around you, witness it all fall apart. 

i won’t be here when it happens, ill be far gone.

ill be fixing everything you broke, ill have moved on. 

© nldm